This made me laugh

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee, and a 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single." The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?" The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."

 

Star Trek Spoof

 

Did one like that when I was 25, woke up, got dressed and went home to find out my now bloody shirt had adhered to the wounds on my back. Let's just say alcohol had impared my vision that night.

 

You must have mixed with some dodgy people phred, I'd still be running if I met her.

 

Let's say diverse, that was after of night of drinking and howling at the moon at a Roadhouse called the coyote club.

"This historic landmark was first home to the Rock Castle Supper Club in the early 1930’s hosting some of the great Big Band Jazz musicians of all time. It was the legendary Coyote Club in the 1970’s and 80’s where some of the best Classic Rock and Blues bands played. James Rowe & Judy Schoenecker bought this historic corner and in March of 1999 opened Roadhouse Blues where some of the nation’s best blues bands loved to play."

Captains of industry, finance people, tv stars, bikers, engineers, you name it, went there to howl at the moon..

 

It will suck you in. The extrapolative evidence is that it will have a black hole!

 

What a way to go

 

The final frontier mate!

 

At the coyote club I danced on 2 seperate occasions with Kirstie Alley, she must have been at least 6'1' and married at the time, but still came back to Wichita to party! Yeah that's before she blimped out., But it was while she was doing the Cheers tv show at the time.

 

I certainly wouldn’t complain if I got detention

 

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I finally got a girlfriend long enough that I felt confident enough to visit my parents.

We used her car and got a flat tyre on the way.

In case they were worried I called them up and said, '' Hi Mum, I'm going to be late, my girlfriend's got a puncture."

"Oh" she sighed. "I thought you were bringing a real one"

 

Should have told her you were having to plug the hole...

 

Is she squeaking one out?

 

You sure it did not have a wet nose sounds a right dog to me

 

And a fat one for that matter, cheers

 

Spent the night in the tub then