This made me laugh

Repeat joke, please refer yourself to Mr Orange

 

Me, when Im trying to fix my bike...

https://www.reddit.com/r/aww/comments/axslaq/her_reaction_at_the_end/

 

View attachment 53251

 

Sounds about right for me these days......

 

Reminds me to of trips to the TT when we used to stay in a B&B on Woodville terrace halfway up the hill going to the top of Bray hill and overlooking Douglas bay (£6.50 a night bliss)
The lodge next door was called the Suncourt and had a sign on the corner made out of large yellow letters fixed to a metal rail
Some residents hung out their window one night and rearranged it to the 'Sourc*nt' and it was up for quite a while until the owners spotted it and the guilty party was evicted !
Wish I still had the photo of my late great mate Mel posing underneath and pointing....Happy days !

 

£6.50 a night!!! what year was that?

Last time I was B&B in IOM it was over £400 a week double room.

 

As I ams sure you would all agree, in the dark days before internet porn, there often wasn’t a great deal to occupy yourself when travelling alone and living out of hotels.

I took to writing something along the lines of the following in the Gideons Bible in each room I used.

“If you enjoyed reading this book, you might wish to try others in this series of fiction. Titles include:

• Baha'i Faith: The Seven Valleys and The Four Valleys
• Buddhism: The Tipitaka
• Christianity: The Bible
• Hinduism: The Vedas and The Upanishads
• Islam: The Quran and The Hadiths
• Jainism: The Agamas
• Judaism: The Tanakh and The Talmud
• Shintoism: The Kojiki
• Sikhism: The Guru Granth Sahib
• Taoism: The Dao De Jing
• Wicca: The Book of Shadows
• Zoroastrianism: The Avesta”

If I was in a hurry I’d hide the bible somewhere in the room (behind the cistern, on top of the cupboard, behind a radiator, under the mattress, inside the cistern... etc) as I didn’t want to steal it but felt something needed to be done about this twat Gideon who kept leaving his f’king books everywhere.

PS: Let me know if I have forgotten to offend someone there...

PPS: maybe I should have just torn out the last page from the bible, so no one would know how it ended?

 

The logical inference is that you have been diverted from scribbling in Bibles by internet porn! Salvation indeed!

 

Early 80s was a bit basic.....

 

As a devout atheist, I feel I am being victimized by my exclusion from this offensive act .......


if I was a feckin snowflake !

 

Don't upset your builder

 

is that Dilligaf's house? I think he pissed his builder off recently - they finished the bathroom and ran away, maybe leaving a cock and balls on his chimney!

 

I did wonder why a bathroom fitter needed to go on my roof
Now I know the fecker

 

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