This made me laugh

,

 

Overloaded

 

.

 

,

 

,

 

Just having a laugh.

 

I'd raise that fence a bit after seeing that.

 

Good shot

 

.

 

.

 

.

 

If Masterchef did beans on toast...

 

At a job interview... "What would you say was your greatest weakness?" "Honesty." "I don't think honesty is a weakness." "I don't give a fuck what you think!"

 

If your boyfriend remembers your eye colour after the first date... Then you probably have small tits!

 

As a child: "You are grounded!" As an adult: "Your package will be delivered between 8am and 6pm!"

 

I'd like to thank my legs for supporting me. My arms for always being by my side. And my fingers, I could always count on them.

 

I got off with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on. I said, "Nah, you're just pulling my leg."

 

,

 

My new girlfriend really hates it when I use the words "dick head" and "twat". So I've promised to make a real effort to learn her kids real names.