This made me laugh

Not much health and safety going around in the 60s.

 

Have a safe trip, don't forget to take plenty of pictures.

 

I've decided to plant a row of bushes along my property line. I don't have the money to start just yet. I'll have to put some cash away for the project.

It'll be my hedge fund.

 

Sorry about the awful jokes and puns, but I'm a groan man.

 

We used to have a dalmatian.

We named her G-Spot.

We could never find her.

 

A guy is talking to his buddy and says, "I had a hell of an experience last night. I went to my fiancé's house and her gorgeous, younger sister answers the door in her underwear and invites me in. She tells me my fiancé is out with their parents and they won't be back for a couple hours. Then she says, seductively, that we could use the time to have some fun." "What did you do?" asks the buddy. The guy says, "I turned around, walked out, and there was my fiancé and her parents on the lawn, clapping. She hugged me and said I passed their test."
"Wow", says the buddy. "That took some will power!" "Not really," says the guy.
"I'm just glad I keep my condoms in my glovebox."

 

I post this in tribute to a brilliant comedian and legend.

 

I nominate Venetian Blinds as the most important invention of all time. After all, if they hadn't been invented it'd be curtains for all of us.