This made me laugh

The Squabbit.

This shy, rarely seen creature is indigenous to southern New Jersey. A hybrid cross between a squirrel and a rabbit. They exhibit all the annoying traits of a squirrel with none of the cuteness of a bunny. The squabbit has a vertical leap of about six feet due to their rabbit, hopping genes which enable them to jump directly onto the suspended bird feeder, bypassing the usual scramble up the pole tactic employed be purebred squirrels. They have been known to drag away small children and force them to cuddle.



Actually, this is Matilda, one of our regulars at the bird feeder, sorry, squirrel feeder. She showed up about two weeks ago with her tail broken near its base. Maybe an encounter with a hawk? Anyway, her tail fell off completely. She doesn't seem to be any the worse for wear. She doesn't appear to miss it.

Her male suitors still chase her around, but nobody is getting any tail.

 

This whole OceanGate disaster situation ... it's been the worst thing for subs since Jared Fogle

 

If boobs are buoyant she'll certainly never drown!

 

Four married guys go fishing. After an hour, the following conversation took place....
First guy, "You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out fishing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend"....
Second guy, "That's nothing; I had to promise my wife that I will build her a new deck for the pool"......
Third guy, "Man, you both have it easy!
I had to promise my wife that I will remodel the kitchen for her".....
They continue to fish when they realized that the fourth guy has not said a word.
So they asked him. "You haven't said anything about what you had to do to be able to come fishing this weekend.
What's the deal"....?
Fourth guy, "I just set my alarm for 5:30 am. When it went off, I shut off my alarm, gave the wife a nudge and said, "Fishing or sex," and she said, "Wear sun-block!!..

 

Another family photo...