This made me laugh

“Accidentally” falling (bare-arsed) onto a 2” shell would have made your eyes water…

 

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A testament to Chinese quality control.

 

BREAKING NEWS:
Macron under pressure to apologise to clowns for 'outrageous slur'.

 

Breaking news. Macron bought a mirror and has now gone silent.

 

Macron and Johnson have a lot of things in common.

 

That guy was fired but eventually found employment at a lab in Wuhan.

 

Allegedly…

 

Reminds me of a few 1980-90’s rugby tours…..always eventful! Couldn’t get away with that now!!! Let’s not go there!!!

 

Reminds me of a few 1980-90’s rugby tours…..always eventful! Couldn’t get away with that now!!! Let’s not go there!!!

 

I feel bad for my dentist. She's always looking down in the mouth.

She said, "You ride a motorcycle, don't you?" I said "Yes, how did you know?" She said, "Bugs in your teeth."

I asked what sedative she likes using the most. She said nitrous oxide. It's a gas.

I was a bit worried after she examined the X-rays of my teeth. She came back in singing "The Yanks are coming."

I asked her what would happen if she had to pull more than one tooth. She said we'd cross that bridge when we came to it.

She said she once assisted a veterinary dentist work on a deer. It had buck teeth.

She's such a good dentist she won an award. It was a little plaque.

She knows I'm a retired cop. She said now I was going to find out what it's like to be the subject of a cavity search.

She's actually very attractive. We went out once. At the end of the evening she said she didn't want to see me again for six months.

I asked her how she could stand looking in people's mouths all day. She said she just pretends their mouths are open wallets.


Thanks, I'll be here all week.

 

Yep, me too, Dawsy. And mine's only two days before. My ex-husband used to say Merry Birthday and Happy Christmas. The key in that sentence is "ex".

 

Perhaps made for the Australian market?

 

My wife and I met when I was playing in goal for a local 5 a side team. It was love at first sight; she told her friend “He’s a keeper!”

 

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