This made me laugh

Darwin Awards?

 

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Absolutely! (Wrong thread, maybe? )

 

I can literally smell the burnt hair

 

Did you go on to postgraduate studies?

I tried to get on to the teaching staff when I was younger, but there were no vacant openings at the time.

 

Oy ! I was pulling a caravan .

 

****True facts****
1. In the 1400s a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb.
Hence we have 'the rule of thumb.'
2. Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled 'Gentlemen Only...
Ladies Forbidden'... and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.
3. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David,
Hearts - Charlemagne,
Clubs -Alexander the Great,
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
4. In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase......... 'goodnight, sleep tight.'
5. It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink.
Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.
6. Since 2017, Sunderland fans have said they are going to win the league at the start of every football season, hence the phrase ‘deluded twat’.

 

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Some grave humour there...................