This made me laugh

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Darwin award winners.

 

I used to work with a guy whose wife clearly had body image issues, she went from anorexia to this sort of malarky. It took him a while to stop telling me what competitions she was going to at the weekend as he found he was offended by my Monday morning greeting of "How did the freak show go?"

 

I changed the football team I play for recently and the coach said if I wasn’t playing too well that he’d pull me off at half time which I thought was a bit extreme as my previous coach only used to give out oranges.

 

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Thirsty...

 

What could go wrong?