This made me laugh

OK, this probably wasn't funny for the other guy, but he didn't die or actually crash and I had tears running down my cheeks!

I was riding down from Glenshee ski centre today, saw a couple of bike approaching from behind, catching me quite quickly, all of a sudden this guy appears on my right, heading into a blind right hander!!!! He tries his damdest to make it around (thank God nothing coming other way, he wouldn't have seen it or it see him). Could see he wasn't going to make it, and the daft bugger stood the bike up and ran onto the grass, 30yds bouncing over the grass and he makes it back on, by this time my shock had turned to massive hilarity inside my helmet. He slows down, A LOT, and I pass him, never to be seen again. He does offer a wee of apology. If I wasn't laughing so hard, I would have stopped and told him what a twat move that was!!!!

He was so lucky there was an actual run off area, and not a drop or a wall.

All I can think was that I was 'only' doing 65 and a fully loaded up cruiser, he thought I was going to brake before the corner and he would nip in in front, still a twat of a move whatever. But I was doing 65 and was going to continue doing close to that around the corner. Pegs would have been close to tarmac, but the old girl does like to hustle through the bends (well I do).

My missus phoned me just after the incident as I was going through Braemar, and I was still pissing myself. Had to open visor to wipe my Eye's.

 

Fixed!

 

Whats wrong with that then?

 

That's shocking maintenance, just look at the rust forming on that sprocket.

 

Obviously an amateur, no need for the split link right next to the bolted link!

 

The inventor of yodelling has died. Sadly, so did his little old lady too.

 

The Yodel-diploma...

 

Got a tattoo of a digital watch on my wrist.

I regretted it, literally one minute later.

 

A bloke was standing at a bar and a beautiful Woman was beside him . He leans over and says "You remind me of my little toe" .

She replies "What ? ..... you mean I am small and cute ?"

And He replies "Nope .... I`ll probably bang you on the Coffee Table later when I`m drunk"

 

Murphy asked Paddy 'What ringtone have you got?'.
Paddy answers 'I've never realy looked, but probably light brown !'.

 

"Give it to me!" she yelled, "I'm so fecking wet, give it to me now!"

She could scream all she wanted. I was keeping the umbrella.

 

Beats my wire coat hanger repair.

 

I'm thinking of putting a new chain on mine soon, so that picture is very helpful.

 

@ least you know how accurate it is ! 100% correct twice daily !!!

 

The wife walked in last night and took her bra off, with a cheeky wink she said "Suck on these"."sod off" I said, "They've been on the floor"

 

I had an argument with someone today, to put their point across they threw a pair of orthopedic shoes at me. I now stand corrected.