This made me laugh

To Adie P who wrote, "He wore a belt that he'd made from the coal conveyor material and when that was laid across a bare backside for some terrible misdemeanour or other it was pretty damned certain you were going to be either sensible enough to never repeat the sin, or wily enough to not get caught!"

Right on!

 

Me as well, and I was actually a fitter worked at the coal face maintaining the powered supports etc til I was made redundant in 86, 2 shifting spanners, a big muckle screwdriver and a hammer and chisel and you could repair just about anything

 

Superb David--my grandfather was a miner for 50yrs(he got a watch and a bit of paper in a frame for his services) this poem is great thank you

 

And if the job got complicated..... you used a bigger hammer

 

The definition of aTwat.

 

Ouch! You know you all tried Lava soap when you were teens.

 

THE HILLBILLY VASECTOMY
After their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger bed.
So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children.
The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive.

'A less costly alternative,' said the doctor, 'is to go home, get a cherry bomb, light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to your ear and count to 10.'

The Alabamian said to the doctor, 'I may not be the smartest tool in the shed, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me.'
'Trust me,' said the doctor.
So the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can.
He held the can up to his ear and began to count!

'1'
'2'
'3'
'4'
'5'
At which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs and continued counting on his other hand.

This procedure also works in Tennessee , Kentucky , Arkansas , Texas , Louisiana , Georgia , Mississippi , Missouri , the panhandle of Florida , West Virginia and Washington DC.

 

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Err...