Rant of the day

Cake, Boobies and motorbikes - see - no argument..

 

FFS....stickie toffee pudding
Washed down with Jack Daniels

Bunch of bloody girlies

 

Sticky Toffee Pudding, like Coke (Cola) rots yer brain and yer teeth.

 

I'd be in a coma if I tried to eat a slice of that. Serious sugar overload.

 

I may be in a spot of bother here...

 

Yer reckon ?..........

 

Perfect, but a shave first and no tongue or swapping gob on the first date.

 

? And??.....that’s the attraction

 

I do have standards, not very high mind you, but I do have standards.

 

Yep
South Shields born
South Shields bred
Strong in the arm
But thick in the head

 

Could be a Kawasaki owner in disguise, remember 6 brain cells ?.

 

Guilty, I've had a few Kawa's in my past, but I have seen the light with the Bonneville SE. Make sure the brain cells are from a xxtard, as they are unlikely to have been used.

 

Triple chocollate cake if I'm feeling manly. Coffee and walnut cake when manly's not around.

Oh, and pecan pie when on the left side of the pond.

 

Well DD, I'd respectfully suggest that being marked out as a rampant homosexual would be easier done by the WAY you eat and not WHAT you eat. Unless, of course you're eating ..... wait, no, let's not go further down that dark track, eh?

Cake is cake - who gives a toss what's in it, who's eating it, how it's served and how you eat it? Not I.

 

What? The forum's coming too?

Shit, we should all get Vulpes in here with some hash cake and CHILL ......

 

Remember the distinctly unmemorable evening tv magazine programme Nationwide with Frank Bough? I still remember a piece with Fanny Craddock teaching the UK how to make doughnuts.
Everything went fine until Frank’s sign off when he wished us all goodnight and expressed the hope that “all our doughnuts turned out like Fanny’s.”
You could hear the sound of a studio collapsing......

 

FFS! You bunch of twats! All this favourite fruit or vegetable cake crap! It’s obvious what The best cake is: it’s the one on the plate in front of you, if it’s not there it doesn’t exist, so it’s the only cake and the only cake in existence is my favourite cake!
Mind you fruitcake has to be the order of the day here

 

Pie not cake!! Get a life

 

Cake is what you eat, soap is....ah ok!

 

Right, let's get this thread back on track.

Electric handbrakes.

Just had a horrible diesel VW Golf Estate for a week as a hire car. No wonder it was left over. What a GPOS. Gutless, didn't like corners, huge but no great actual increase in boot space. A total POS.

But to cap it off, it had an electronic handbrake. Have you tried to drive in stop start traffic on a hill??? Do I not trust that auto stop function, and then the feckin POS turns the engine of !!!! WTF.

I tried to parallel park on a hill, back of the car downhill. No fuckin chance, gave up and found another space.

Electric handbrakes are another example of car makers solving a problem I didn't have. Like keyless ignition.

I love tech, but this is going to far, tech to solve a problem that didn't exist. And how the fuck am I supposed to perform a handbrake turn ??? I do do these occasionally, usually as part of a rally event, but whats going to happen when all cars come with these stupid POS electronic POS's.

 

As I am very sure of my sexuality, as I do not own any type of man bag, or any ''products' for my skin, I can happily declare that the best cake is ...............Banoffee Pie.

No word of a lie, every birthday, for my breakfast, I get a home made Banoffee.

 

Disgusting stuff