Happy New Year

Unopened......hope it ain't like that now. Haha.
Happy New Year to everyone I here.
Better place these days .

 

happy new year to one and all,hope 2021 brings you everything good and nothing bad

 

Yes just popped in to say Happy New year to all you special peeps. God pray 2021 brings lots of smiles and less illness you all deserve it.
Joe

 

And this is for tomorrow hope it makes you all smile. If you think of me as a silly beggar it's sure to work.
Joe.









Moments of Clarity



As I sat, strapped in my seat waiting during the countdown, one thought kept crossing my mind ... every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder.

-John Glenn



When the white missionaries came to Africa they had the Bible and we had the land.

They said 'Let us pray.' We closed our eyes.

When we opened them we had the Bible and they had the land.

- Desmond Tutu



America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked.

- David Letterman



I'm not a paranoid, deranged millionaire. I'm a billionaire.

- Howard Hughes



After the game, the King and the Pawn go into the same box.

- Italian proverb



The only reason they say 'Women and children first' is to test the strength of the lifeboats.

- Jean Kerr



I've been married to a communist and a fascist, and neither would take out the garbage.

- Zsa Zsa Gabor



When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.

- Prince Philip



Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself.

- Harrison Ford




Lawyers believe a man is innocent until proven broke.

- Robin Hall



Kill one man and you're a murderer, kill a million and you're a conqueror.

- Jean Rostand.



Having more money doesn't make you happier.

I have 50 million dollars but I'm just as happy as when I had 48 million.

- Arnold Schwarzenegger.



We are here on earth to do good unto others. What the others are here for, I have no idea.

- W. H Auden



If life were fair Elvis would still be alive today and all the impersonators would be dead.

- Johnny Carson




Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is.

- Jimmy Durante



America is so advanced that even some chairs are electric.

- Doug Hamwell



The first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone.

- George Roberts



If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport.

- Jonathan Winter



I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.

- Robert Benchley



The weather person is the only person that I know, that can be wrong 99.9 % of the time and still have a job the next day.

-Johnny Carson

 

And now the new year starts..............

 

Yep and let’s hope it is going to be better than the last fecking one

 

We're certainly not out of the Covid woods yet but welcome 2021 and feck off 2020!

Just a few things to ponder and reflect on......

1. The dumbest thing I ever bought was a 2020 planner.

2. 2019: Stay away from negative people. 2020: Stay away from positive people.

3. The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house & their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!

4. This morning I saw a neighbour talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. I came to my house & told my dog.... We had a good laugh.

5. Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pyjamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.

6. Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we just keep washing our hands?

7. I never thought the comment, “I wouldn’t touch him/her with a 6-foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are!

8. I need to practise social-distancing ....from the refrigerator.

9. I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip out to the bins!

10. Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go into a bank with a mask on and ask for money.

 

A happy and healthy New Year to one and all. In fact, 2020 can feck right off.

 

2020 wasn't that bad was it? OK, mebbe it was. I do recall riding along good biking roads empty of traffic and a couple of my grandkids were born throughout the year. So whilst last year was totally overshadowed by the COVID epidemic and it was a tragic time for those who lost their lives and those who have lost loved ones, you can always find the odd positive if you look hard enough can't you? But I agree, let's all hope for better times in this one day old New Year. .

 

OK, I'll give you that one! No doubt the "normal" we all crave will mean TRAFFIC!