Annoy A Biker In One Line.

During rain ...

You'll get wet ...

Not a wet as you .. you drip !

 

The strange thing is, after I’d made my massive boo boo , Kaz said “ I think I know you” . Well I wracked my brains thinking do you ..? .
It turns out that she is a Solicitor/ Paralegal and she wrote our Will a few years back when my wife was about to undergo some major surgery….
I didn’t recognise her at all but she knew me. She reminded me I need to complete the will…! And I still do ..!

 

It truly is a small world, isn’t it?

 

An ex mate biker saying "I'm not out the weather is looking grim" as there's a grey cloud passing over. in the middle of summer !

 

"No vacancies", admittedly doesn't happen much these days. 30 odd years ago touring in this country with accommodation on spec was never easy (not a problem in Europe).
Or alternatively...
"Yes! Can I help you?" Spoken in an aggressive piss off manner.....
"Yes, we spoke yesterday, I have a room booked"

 

Motorcycles are not dangerous, speed is not dangerous, racing is not dangerous, what is dangerous is CRASHING, or as more frequently happens being knocked off by careless driving by other road users.

 

"Is that a Harley?" Or alternatively "nice Harley".

 

Especially if you're on a Triumph

 

F*** off, I’ll park where I want to … car drivers using ‘motorcycle only’ marked spaces

 

"5. "What's the fastest you've ever gone?" This question is the motorcycle equivalent of the scuba diving-related question, "How deep do you dive?" My answer to that one is always, "Only as deep as I need to go to see what I want to see." I can't quite come up with a similar response to the motorcycle speed question, though. "
Sandi T.

Answer: I dunno, the speedometer only goes up to 140 mph.

 

After some moron pulls out in front of you:

"I thought those things stopped on a dime."

Also, a sign on a local restaurant parking lot " NO Motorcycles."

However, I see where the management was coming from in this case.

As it turns out, a couple was dining there at the outdoor bar few years ago. A 1% type started harassing them with lewd comments about the wife. There was a confrontation and the biker pulled a knife. The male half of the couple was an off-duty cop. It's always a mistake to bring a knife to a gunfight. The cop shot and killed him.

 

One guy on a bike pulls a knife so all motorcyclists are banned? I can't say I agree with the management on that one.

 

From other bikers,( we'll only do 60 mph so you can keep up with us on that)

 

Today’s annoying one liner? It’s snowing ☹️.

 

Indeed it is.

 

Tha'll need tha Big Coat, lad.

 

Aye, tha’s reyt.

 

Not a one liner, but it did piss me off.

About ten years ago I walked into the Town Tavern one winter night with ice literally clinging to my beard and I take a seat.

There's a kid sitting there festooned in Harley regalia - jacket, sweatshirt, boots and that silly HD fisherman's cap.

I've eaten sandwiches bigger than this kid.

Kid: "Watcha riding?"
Me: "A Victory."
Kid: "Tisk...shoulda' bought a Harley."
Me: "Yeah, I'm an idiot. I could have spent $3000 more on an over-hyped overpriced, underpowered, motorcycle with 60's technology that handles like a dump truck."
Kid: "Well, at least Harleys are American Made."
Me: "By law, for something to be labeled "Made in U.S.A." they have to be at least 70% American parts. My Victory has "Made in U.S.A." stamped right on top of the valve covers. Look hard. You won't find that stamp anywhere on your Harley. By the way... I didn't see any other motorcycles on the lot. Where's your Harley?"
Kid: "Well, it's home in the garage. I usually only ride with my club."
Me: "Is it pink?"
Kid: "What?"
Me: "Is it the Barbie Edition?"
Kid: "No! It's a Sportster."
Me: "Oh, they're nice. My little sister rides one."

Nothing against HDs. I've owned a few. I just get a kick out of motorcycle snobbery.