This made me laugh

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by Havit, Sep 23, 2015.

  1. DCS900

    DCS900 Careful, man! There’s a beverage here!

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    Man goes in a pub.
    Barman said, "sorry, we don't serve drinks to exotic fruit."
     
    #28961
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  2. Vulpes

    Vulpes Confused Member

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    I've no qualms about shooting animals for food - I've done so. One clean shot, lights out. No pain, no fear, and the animal, which has had a good life, gets eaten. Culling does not need to be cruel, and is neccessary.
     
    #28962
    • Agree Agree x 6
  3. Russell Stroup

    Russell Stroup Noble Member

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    37A09FAF-1B13-43E1-A491-7A82E9EBCA12.jpeg
     
    #28963
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  4. Sandi T

    Sandi T It's ride o'clock somewhere!
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    Screen Shot 2021-09-15 at 10.23.15 PM.png
     
    #28964
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  5. Vulpes

    Vulpes Confused Member

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    [​IMG]
     
    #28965
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  6. Vulpes

    Vulpes Confused Member

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    [​IMG]
     
    #28966
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  7. SleepyOwl

    SleepyOwl Crème de la Crème

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    #28967
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  8. DCS900

    DCS900 Careful, man! There’s a beverage here!

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    .

    49C693B0-8A36-4A23-81B5-36076F521885.jpeg
     
    #28968
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  9. DCS900

    DCS900 Careful, man! There’s a beverage here!

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    Can’t believe what I saw in McDonald’s today. An old man placed an order for one hamburger , French fries and a drink.

    He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one half in front of his wife. He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife.

    He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them.

    As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people around them were looking over and whispering. Obviously they were thinking, 'That poor old couple - all they can afford is one meal for the two of them.'

    As the man began to eat his fries a young man came to the table and politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple. The old man said they were just fine - they were used to sharing everything.

    People closer to the table noticed the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite. She sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink.

    Again the young man came over and begged them to let him buy another meal for them. This time the old woman said 'No thank you, we are used to sharing everything.'

    Finally, as the old man finished and was wiping his face neatly with the napkin the young man again came over to the little old lady who had yet to eat a single bite of food and asked, 'What is it you are waiting for?'

    She answered 'THE TEETH'.
     
    #28969
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  10. Dave49

    Dave49 Elite Member

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    Cabinet Reshuffle:
    Germany’s culture minister is a trained art historian; France’s wrote a book on Verdi. The new UK culture secretary ate ostrich anus on I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here.
     
    #28970
    Last edited: Sep 16, 2021
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  11. Dougie D

    Dougie D Crème de la Crème

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    #28971
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  12. Dougie D

    Dougie D Crème de la Crème

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    Horse power
    242221167_4741286395903412_3271491853068011473_n.jpg
     
    #28972
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  13. Erling

    Erling Elite Member

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    Venn diagrams, anyone?

    FB_IMG_1630686269569.jpg

    too-good-photo-u1.jpeg

    also-will-scratch-photo-u1.jpeg
     
    #28973
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  14. Vulpes

    Vulpes Confused Member

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    [​IMG]
     
    #28974
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  15. Vulpes

    Vulpes Confused Member

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    That would be this road, in Hubei, China... Were you to change your mind... :laughing:

     
    #28975
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  16. Cyborgbot

    Cyborgbot Guest


    Would someone please explain this?
     
    #28976
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  17. Cyborgbot

    Cyborgbot Guest

    Stuart Leslie Goddard If we are to be accurate.

    However it would make for a shit joke so please go with Adam Ant. Twat.
     
    #28977
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  18. stollydriver

    stollydriver Elite Member

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    That's 3rd gear cog - easy fix erase 3rd gear position on gear stick..
     
    #28978
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  19. DCS900

    DCS900 Careful, man! There’s a beverage here!

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    Did you wear a white, under eye stripe in the late 70’s by any chance???
     
    #28979
    • Funny Funny x 4
  20. Cyborgbot

    Cyborgbot Guest

    Our is certain to be best prepared to deal with internet trolls and woke voters.
     
    #28980
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