This made me laugh

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by Havit, Sep 23, 2015.

  1. Winglad

    Winglad Crème de la Crème

    Dec 21, 2016
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    I like this new 'useful'-button... :D
     
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  2. Havit

    Havit Admin
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    #2382 Havit, May 12, 2017
    Last edited: May 12, 2017
    The other one is one of Rolf Harris s old brushes. . So you now dont have to ask " do you know what it is yet " :D:D:D
     
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  3. Tomo

    Tomo Active Member

    Apr 23, 2016
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    Now then - lets get this straight, you are suggesting that people that play/played hockey are adept at housework?
    I can't speak on behalf of Mr Orange, but as we're both ex ice hockey players I'm sure he'll join me in taking great exception to this stereotype - For god's sake man, my wife might see this and insist that I am predisposed to hoovering the house instead of tinkering in the garage.
     
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  4. Tomo

    Tomo Active Member

    Apr 23, 2016
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    I feel a bench clearance coming on!
    Anyway, would you want to mess with women ice hockey players - they only take their pads off after three periods........
     
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  5. Havit

    Havit Admin
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    For anyone who uses the Dartford crossing FB_IMG_1494664163555.jpg
     
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  6. Havit

    Havit Admin
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    FB_IMG_1494663976725.jpg
     
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  7. MrOrange

    MrOrange Guest

    A PLANE IS ON ITS WAY TO TORONTO , WHEN A BLONDE IN ECONOMY CLASS GETS UP AND MOVES TO THE FIRST CLASS SECTION AND SITS DOWN.

    THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT WATCHES HER DO THIS AND ASKS TO SEE HER TICKET.

    SHE THEN TELLS THE BLONDE THAT SHE PAID FOR ECONOMY CLASS AND THAT SHE WILL HAVE TO SIT IN THE BACK.

    THE BLONDE REPLIES, "I'M BLONDE, I'M BEAUTIFUL, I'M GOING TO TORONTO AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE."

    THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT GOES INTO THE COCKPIT AND TELLS THE PILOT AND THE CO-PILOT THAT THERE IS A BLONDE BIMBO SITTING IN FIRST CLASS, THAT BELONGS IN ECONOMY AND WON'T MOVE BACK TO HER SEAT.

    THE CO-PILOT GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND TRIES TO EXPLAIN THAT BECAUSE SHE ONLY PAID FOR ECONOMY SHE WILL HAVE TO LEAVE AND RETURN TO HER SEAT.

    THE BLONDE REPLIES, "I'M BLONDE, I'M BEAUTIFUL, I'M GOING TO TORONTO AND I'M STAYING RIGHT HERE."

    THE CO-PILOT TELLS THE PILOT THAT HE PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE THE POLICE WAITING WHEN THEY LAND TO ARREST THIS BLONDE WOMAN WHO WON'T LISTEN TO REASON.

    THE PILOT SAYS, "YOU SAY SHE IS A BLONDE? I'LL
    HANDLE THIS, I'M MARRIED TO A BLONDE. I SPEAK BLONDE."

    HE GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND WHISPERS IN HER EAR, AND SHE SAYS, "OH, I'M SORRY." AND GETS UP AND GOES BACK TO HER SEAT IN ECONOMY.

    THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT AND CO-PILOT ARE AMAZED AND ASKED HIM WHAT HE SAID TO MAKE HER MOVE WITHOUT ANY FUSS.

    "I TOLD HER, 'FIRST CLASS ISN'T GOING TO TORONTO."
     
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  8. Havit

    Havit Admin
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    FB_IMG_1494664380788.jpg
     
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  9. Havit

    Havit Admin
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    FB_IMG_1494664430908.jpg
     
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  10. Havit

    Havit Admin
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    received_1320136881354826.jpeg
     
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  11. Havit

    Havit Admin
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    FB_IMG_1494663638169.jpg
     
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  12. andypandy

    andypandy Crème de la Crème

    Jan 10, 2016
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    So there I was this morning, my breakfast tray across my lap, dunking my toast soldiers into my soft boiled egg. When all of a sudden the window cleaner appears at the window, banging on the window, effin and geffin !
    Blimey thinks I, he must have lost his rag !
     
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  13. H.O.

    H.O. Noble Member

    Nov 28, 2015
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    This is TRUE!!!! (must, its in todays Mail!)
    A Zimbabwian Pastor got eaten by a crocodile while showing his congregation how Jesus walked on water!!!
    All that was left was a pair of pants and sandals.
    The irony of it, it cracked me up!:eek::)
    A quote from the croc: Pastor? Sorry I thought they said PASTY!!:eek:
     
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  14. MrOrange

    MrOrange Guest

    upload_2017-5-15_16-22-28.jpeg
     
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  15. MrOrange

    MrOrange Guest

    [​IMG]
     
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  16. MrOrange

    MrOrange Guest

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  17. Sceptic Al

    Sceptic Al Well-Known Member

    Q. What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo?
    A. One is fat and ugly, the other is a little lighter;)
     
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  18. MrOrange

    MrOrange Guest

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  19. MrOrange

    MrOrange Guest

  20. MrOrange

    MrOrange Guest

    Screenshot_20170516-204909.jpg
    Maybe not!!!! :laughing:
     
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