This made me laugh

I think my wife has started to show the first signs of memory loss...
She said she can't remember what she ever saw in me!

 

DRINK DRIVING WARNING
I know we motorBike owners are responsible, but this is a warning to be careful about drink driving as we are getting close to Christmas.
A couple of nights ago, I was out for a few drinks with some friends after work. One thing lead to another and I had a few too many pints and then topped it off with a couple of jaegerbombs. Not a good idea. Knowing full well I was over the limit, I did something I’ve never done before...
I left my motorbike in town and took a taxi home. Sure enough, I passed a police checkpoint where they were pulling over drivers and performing breathalizer tests. Because I was in a taxi they just waved it past. I arrived home safely and without incident, which was a real surprise..
I've never driven a taxi before and I am not even sure where I got it from

 

Every morning, I text my 13 y/o granddaughter:

"Good Morning. Have a great day. I love you ."

Or something to that effect.

I get back:

"gm thnx u2"

At least she answers me.

 

Well that’s the lights done for another year.

 

And expecting a printed receipt from the store.

 

Commas count!

 

Last one for today. Ahhh, but there are so many!