This made me laugh

That looks like a fun game!

 

Hold me coat ....

 

Watch this!……..

 

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A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel stuffed down the front of his britches. Bartender says, "What's up with that?"

Pirate says, "Arrrrgh, it's drivin' me nuts."

 

I don't like discussing my plans for the day.

Next thing you know the district attorney is throwing the word "premeditated" around in the courtroom.

 

You might have to have a word with @Mrs Visor when she reaches the ground

 

That helicopter looks about the same size as the Hornet that stung me last week.

I don’t believe Mrs Visor was dangling from it but I many be wrong.

 

Incidentally, kudos to Mrs V. I sincerely hope that I’ll never have to meet her in need of her professional capacity.

 

Rope walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, "Get out of here. We don't serve ropes."
The rope goes outside and asks a passerby to tie him into a half-hitch and rub him on the concrete sidewalk, which the passerby does.
The rope then goes back into the bar and orders a drink.
The bartender says "Aren't you the rope I threw out of here a few minutes ago?"
The rope says, "No, I'm a frayed knot."

 

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On a beautiful summer's day, two English motorcyclists were driving through Wales.
They stopped at Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwyllllantysiliogogoch for lunch, and one of the riders asked the waitress, 'Before we order, I wonder if you could settle an argument for us. Can you pronounce where we are, very slowly?'
The girl leaned over and said, 'Burrr … gurrr … king'.........

 

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What they need is Mrs Visor to do her dangly thing with an ice-scraper.

 

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