This made me laugh

A friend wrote me this today: I'm sitting at home doing nothing, complaining about everything, and waiting for a government check. Holy crap I'm turning into a democrat!

 

Wanky McKrankie Sturgeon should have a plastic bag over her head, with a secure fixing around the neck. Just my view on the matter...…………….

 

Bozo Johnson should be first for the plastic bag treatment in my opinion, but I don't suppose his government would be capable of ordering enough plastic bags...

 

Asking for a friend
Tucker

 

@SprinterII
Tucker

 

what? I get it, looking down while riding you get reminded about the mistake you made

 

I walked into the local cafe and said, "Can you do me a breakfast my way?"
The bloke behind the counter said, "Certainly, what's your way?"
I said, "Well, first of all I want a fried egg. It should be fried so hard that you can take it off of the plate and bounce it. The beans, they've got to be cold inside, hot outside. I want the fried bread absolutely dripping in grease. I want tomato skins - no tomatoes, just the skins. The bacon has got to be so well done that when you put the fork in it, it springs all over the room. You got that?"
He says, "I haven't got time for all that."
I said, "You fucking found time yesterday!"

 

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