This made me laugh

Discussion in 'Lounge' started by Havit, Sep 23, 2015.

  1. David Cooper

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  4. Big Sandy

    Big Sandy WOOF! WOOF!

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    Fuck off you nosy cunt
    Thought long and hard about posting this....

    What key can open any door?

    A pikey.
     
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  6. Big Sandy

    Big Sandy WOOF! WOOF!

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    Fuck off you nosy cunt
    Oh-oh.

    Thought that was just me.....
     
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    Big Sandy WOOF! WOOF!

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    Awww nice dog. Not a mongrel, must be pure bread.
     
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  20. David Cooper

    David Cooper Triumph Rocketeer.
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    A little girl was leaning into a lion's cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the collar of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to eat her, all under the eyes of her screaming parents.
    A biker jumps off his Triumph, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch. Whimpering from the pain, the lion jumps back, letting go of the girl, and the biker brings the girl to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly.
    A reporter has watched the whole event.
    The reporter, addressing the Triumph rider says, "Sir, this was the most gallant and bravest thing I've seen a man do in my whole life.”
    The Triumph rider replies, "Why, it was nothing, really. The lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted as I felt right.”
    The reporter says, "Well, I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm a journalist, you know, and tomorrow's paper will have this story on the front page. So, what do you do for a living, and what political affiliation do you have?”
    The biker replies "I'm a British Army veteran, a Conservative and I voted for Brexit”. The journalist leaves.
    The following morning the biker buys the paper to see if it indeed brings news of his actions, and reads, on the front page: UK VETERAN ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT & STEALS HIS LUNCH.
    And THAT pretty much sums up the media's approach to the news these days.
     
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