This made me laugh

Two Irish men on their way home after a night in the Pub find a head lying on the pavement. One picks it up by the hair, holds it above his head into the light and says, "'Tis Murphy be Jesus". The other one says, "Don't be so feckin silly, he was never that tall".

 

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I just bought an expensive car, only to find the reverse gear broken... There's no going back now!

 

I love to pamper my girlfriend after a long day at work. I get her to text me when she's leaving so I can get the hot tap running, swirl around the foam & bubbles & time everything perfectly so that the moment she walks through the door, the dishes are piled up & waiting for her!

 

My wife and I went to the Royal Show and one of the first exhibits we
stopped at was the breeding bulls.. We went up to the first pen and
there was a sign attached that said,

' THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR '

My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs .......Smiled and said, 'He
mated 50 times last year, that's almost once a week.'

We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,
''THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR'

My wife gave me a healthy jab and said, 'WOW~~That's more than twice!
a week ! .........You could learn a lot from him.'

We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said,
in capital letters,
'THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR'

My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said,
'That's once a day .You could REALLY learn something from this one.'

I looked at her and said,
'Go over and ask him if it was with the same cow.'

 

Why did Hitler commit suicide?



He got the gas bill.

 

Doesn't offend me, just bad taste in my view.

 

Just scroll by then !


If you think it's bad taste, then are you not offended ??? It's hardly touching a raw nerve, doubt anybody on here was in Belsen. It's a joke, read it, laugh or not and scroll on.

 

Only in bad taste if we can only make fun of everyone else, which we have in this thread. By the way, my last name is Mensch. If you can’t make a joke about yourself don’t point your humor at someone else.