Rant of the day

Be cautious when you're gardening then Jack, cat shite and Toxoplasmosis come to mind, very unpleasant.

 

Is it me or are Taps getting more complicated. I just want to wash my hands, but every time I go to a public toilet I seem to come across yet another way of turning on the tap.

 

I find using telekinesis is the simple way now! Just think I need to wash my hands and stick my hands under a tap and it works, well not all the time but most!!

 

Not only the complicated mechanics with every designer trying to be a bit different, they are then installed the wrong way round by some dozy plumber which confuses you even more.

 

We have moved into a completely modern office building, yet in the toilets (with fancy lighting, music and non-touch flush sensors) they still have separate cold and hot taps, a feature that goes back to Victorian times when hot taps were installed after a cold tap was already there...
I don't know why they cant simply put in a mixer tap so there is no swishing your hands between freezing cold and boiling hot.

 

Eeee!!!...you've got a hard life
Really feel for you

 

...and pedestrians...again, this time at Kings Cross station!
The little green mad goes out, they carry on walking, the little red man lights up and says stop, don't cross! they carry on walking. My light turns green, they carry on walking, I beep, I honk I gesture for them to stop, they carry on walking as if they have some God given priority over all other road traffic

Gotta love the London commute

 

DPD courier pulled across me to turn right.Perfectly straight bit of road. Emergency STOP before I went into the side of his van.
Headlight on. How did he miss me? How did I miss him ? fin fin fin bas cu ffff
ABS cut in at one point, I think it interferes a bit to be honest.
I was going to mention a pleasant ride on "What did you do on your Triumph today"
and instead Im on here RANTing

 

Well about a week ago now my wife announces she's bought me a present. Won't tell me what it is but it cost about £120. So although I don't really do excitement, I am wondering what it is, but she won't tell me. It'll get delivered in a few days. She knows I've been looking at sat navs for the bike so I hope she hasn't bought a really cheap nasty one. I did mention I was after a tap and die set, could it be a Teng all singing all dancing set ?
Then the other day I get home, the wife is out, there's a red card stuck in the letterbox saying there's a parcel for me across the road at Harolds. I go across and knock on his door (he's 94) there's no answer so I figure he might be asleep or dead. I go home, fall asleep, wake up and make my tea. I completely forget about the parcel. My wife comes home.
Next day the doorbell rings, it's Harold with the parcel, he wasn't dead or asleep, he'd gone out bowling.
I put the parcel on the table a rip open the parcel.........
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It's only a firkin hoover !
One of those bloody hand held rechargeable dyson things !
For ME !!
Apparently my car stinks !
It doesn't by the way.
What a complete waste of £120

 

Absolutely brilliant !!!!! I nearly pished myself laughing !!!!!!

 

I was walking through the entrance/exit of my local gym this morning, a young man I guess approx 25/26 yrs old collided with a mum carrying a child & then blocked my path as I exited. He was walking, head down, texting on his f*****g phone! He was shocked when I adivised him to step aside as he did whatever he needed to do ( as I live in Essex, the response was ' whatever'). Then as I'm driving home some twat in a van pulls out in front of me, guess what he was on his f*****g phone! Please tell me, am I just a miserable not so old bastard or do we have a problem here?

 

Yes it's a big problem you don't walk along reading a book or driving your car so why use your phone. I now just keep walking or put my arm out in front of me and let them walk into it.
Tucker

 

With a clenched fist I hope.

 

Spot on don't you just want to slap them silly.
Tucker

 

My wife & I have had to cope with this for the last 25 years! My youngest son was born with a disability (Angelman Syndrome) & has been wheel chair bound for 23 years. The number of times we have had to park elsewhere because some selfish b*****d has parked in a bay either without a badge or with a borrowed badge, I have lost count. I place a printed note on the windscreen asking them if they would like his disability, but water off a ducks back. Totally agree with previous comment, anyone who does this is, needs to take a long hard look in the mirror. No exceptions. Another Rant over.

 

Another good one was to rap the car up in cling film

Tucker

 

Try Singapore !!

 

Yet again, Try Singapore, Just spent a week on holidays there. Even saw a Scooter Rider Texting !!!

Cheers capt.

He was in light traffic.
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Doing about 40 KPH so all OK !!!

 

Toilet paper soaked in wood glue !

 

Just took the wife to work and on the way back a dick head in range rover in front of me turned twice in front of me with out using their turn signal . When we got to the traffic lights and I pulled up beside him and pointed this out all he said was I know which way I'm going. I don't need to signal.
Tucker